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In reflecting on the evening, I wasn’t left with an uplifted
or satisfied feeling, in fact, I was left feeling more miserable than when I
arrived. There is something about
whining and complaining that not only brings everyone around you down, but also
keeps your mind firmly planted in the fields of regret, annoyance, jealousy,
envy and disdain. In other words,
complaining is a downright joy-killer.
A confessor once told my husband that the fastest way to contend
with feelings of discontent, disillusionment or just the general malaise of unhappiness
is to be grateful – for anything really. He asked my husband to focus on only
those things in his life that he was blessed with, to try and recognize what he
had instead of what he didn’t have.
I have never forgotten how he related his blessings to me, and the
overflow of gratitude that followed… thanksgiving for considerable blessings
such as life, love and freedom. And
how he also acknowledged the smaller things like a crunchy apple or a good mystery
novel.
In her book “One Thousand Gifts”, Ann Voskamp says,
“In the original language “he gave thanks”
reads eucharisteo”. The root word of eucharisteo is charis, meaning
“grace.” Jesus took the bread and
saw it as grace
and gave thanks. He took the bread
and knew it to be gift and gave thanks. But there is more, and I read it. Eucharisteo, thanksgiving, envelopes the
Greek word for grace, charis. But
it also holds its derivative, the Greek word
chara, meaning “joy.” …That might
be what the quest for more is all about
– that which Augustine claimed, “Without exception…all try their hardest to reach the same
goal, that is, joy.” ~Pg.32
Ann tells her poetic life story, how she has waded through
the tragic to arrive at a place of gratitude and love, and through them,
happiness. And it all starts with
simply learning to notice the gifts we’ve been given, and return thanks to God.
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1Thessalonians 16-18 states, “Always rejoice. Pray
without ceasing. In all things give thanks; for this is the will of God in
Christ Jesus concerning you all…”
And the bible doesn’t just exhort us to be grateful this once. Giving thanks is mentioned in just about every book and in almost every Psalm. Seems like a pretty simple thing to do to attain a modicum of happiness. Simple, yet so not easy. When I’m down in the dumps, the last thing I want to do is focus on the good things in my life, so discovering them may feel contrived at first.
But once you become aware of the gifts you've been given and begin to acknowledge them, more and more of God’s goodness just pops right out at you, until you come to the right understanding that everything in your life is gift, even the unfortunate and painful. And you can honestly thank God in joy and sorrow alike, and really mean it. Gratefulness becomes habitual, a way of life instead of something you do once a year after your birthday.
“If those who have no
confidence in [Jesus], nor respect for Him, do not receive any of the favours
He offers to all, they have only their own bad disposition to thank for
it. It is true that all cannot
aspire to the same sublime states, to the same gifts, to the same degree of
perfection; yet, if faithful to grace, they corresponded to it, each according
to his degree, they would all be satisfied because they would all attain that
degree of grace and of perfection which would fully satisfy their desires. They would be happy according to
nature, and according to grace, because nature and grace share equally in the
ardent desire for this priceless advantage.”
~Jean-Pierre De
Caussade, Abandonment to Divine Providence
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